Catch Up

Wondering how I've been doing with my Proverbs 31 habits?  I know I've been remiss with the blogging element ... Ugh! But I'm working to catch you up.  Stay tuned!

REAL Food

By now, if you haven't questioned the processed foods in your diet, you must have been away from earth for the past few years (like the kid in Disney's Flight of the Navigator, and yes I am a child of the 80s) or at least the U.S.  I can't turn on the news, open a paper or log on to facebook or twitter without seeing a new study linking something else in the American diet to another chronic disease.  Several of the most popular diets (including the Paleo Diet and Michael Pollan's diet) focus on eliminating the popular processed foods. 

I understand that many of these claims need more investigation, but what these doctors and nutritionists are saying makes sense to me.  Why do I think it is okay to load my body with chemicals and various other non-foods that are designed never to rot?  Why wouldn't it be healthier to eat food closer to its natural state - that is the way God created it?

(from our community garden)

 



The Proverbs 31 woman provided food for her family (v15), brought good to her family - not harm (v12) and she had wisdom (v26).  She didn't have to navigate the modern day grocery stores and restaurants filled with so many products masquerading as "food" that actually do more harm than good to the body.  So, I don't know how she would have approached this dilemma.  But I would love to eliminate processed foods, aiming at a healthier mama and family.

However, I've realized that this is HARD!  Never picking up a pizza or a quesadilla on the way home for dinner?  Never adding chicken and feta cheese to some Near East Couscous for a quick dinner (a staple in my house)?

Originally inspired by my warrior of a cousin who kicked a Stage 3 Brease Cancer Diagnosis in part by changing her diet, I once attempted "Clean Eating" by removing all processed foods from my diet.  I don't think I lasted a single day!  YIKES!  (I didn't realize how much I was attached to Rotel Tomatoes ... I really do think I use them in every soup, stew or chili that I make.)

So, this time around I am limiting my processed foods to 25% of my weekly diet, with particular attention to artificial sugars and dyes.  To make it easier on days when I'm working on projects while juggling a baby and my March volunteer commitments, I took advantage of slow cooker recipes (and yes, I did add Rotel Tomatoes to a couple of them). 

 

My original plan was to bake my own whole wheat bread for sandwiches, but who the heck has time for that? Instead, I am trying to stick with breads containing 5 ingredients or less (or at least ingredients that I understand).

This REAL FOOD website has been amazingly helpful in defining processed foods and providing recipes.  Later in the spring, I plan to attempt completely eliminating processed foods once again with their 10-Day Pledge.  But for now ... baby steps.

Put First Things First

 You will never find time for anything. If you want time you must make it." Charles Buxon

After putting Lil' Bit down for a morning nap, I sit at my desk to begin research for an entrepreneurship activity ... a text message beeps through my phone.  It's a friend confirming weekend plans, so a quick text won't hurt anything.  As I put down the phone, my husband calls to tell me of company coming for dinner  ... surely I have 20 spare minutes to prepare for that.  Back at my computer, I see an email regarding a community service opportunity.  Just as I send a reply and return focus to the research, a noise comes from the monitor ...

"Waaah" from Lil' Bit.  She's wide awake, eager to eat and play.  And "Waaah" for me, as I failed to accomplish my research activity during her nap.  I stayed busy, and even managed a couple of somewhat productive tasks but not my most important tasks.  Ugh!  I know I am so far from my example in Proverbs 31!

"She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family ... she sees that her trading is profitable ... she opens her arms to the poor ... When it snows, she has no fear for her household ... she can laugh at the days to come ..." 

 

Providing food for her family, earning an income, helping the poor, staying prepared for the cold and snow ... and that's just a few of this woman's regular activities.  Obviously, we know she was a Godly woman who leaned on the Lord for strength to be such a good steward of her time.  I also believe this woman had to be incredibly skilled at time management to balance all of the roles she played in her family as well as in the community.
 

Time Management, a skill I used to sharpen regularly, is one that I have neglected over the past months.  And one that needs to be sharper than ever, now that Lil' Bit demands her share of my time. 

 

I know that God has granted me each moment of each day, and that I am commanded to be a good steward of that time.  Just like a budget or a plan is necessary to be a good steward of money, how can I be a good steward of time without the same?  During the next few weeks, I commit to renewing my own time management skills using both Stephen Covey's Time Management Matrix and the concept of "Big Rocks". 

 

Covey's Time Management Matrix from 7 Habits of Highly Effective People helps us to determine which activities should be the focus of our time (those important yet not urgent activities that fit in quadrant II).  

 

 



The idea of "Big Rocks" compares each day of the week to a bucket.  If you begin filling the bucket with pebbles and sand (the first and easiest tasks that come along), you eventually run out of room for the Big Rocks.  The buckets (days) fill up faster than you think, and you can't get more buckets (or time). 

 

So, it's best to move the Big Rocks first and fill in the pebbles and sand around them.  The Big Rocks are the Quadrant II activities.  For me these Big Rocks include Daily Quiet Times, Exercise, Career Advancing Activities, Entrepreneurship Activities, Spending Quality Time with My Husband and Daughter, and Serving Opportunities. 

 

When planning my week (using my planning binders) I commit to scheduling my "Big Rocks" first.  Starting out, I will plan Daily Quiet Time, Exercise + 3-4 Big Rocks each week (no more than one per day, so as not to become overwhelmed when renewing this habit).   And I commit to staying with my plan - refusing to be sidetracked by the urgent yet unimportant activities or spending too much time in the quadrant of waste. 

"Dost thou love life?  Then do not squander time."  Benjamin Franklin

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Clean Home, Happy Mama

"She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness."

Proverbs 31:27

 

Exhausted at the end of a busy day -- preparing to start another LSAT prep class, sending out resumes to rejoin the workforce, teaching an Employment Readiness Class to the ladies at Pathways (being sure to leave dinner for my equally busy husband) and "sigh" running after a crazy crawler who leaves disarrayed toys like the aftermath of a tornado in her wake -- I look around my house to an overwhelming amount of clutter and chores before me.  What happened to my clean and tidy home, my refreshing sanctuary of rest and peace?  Hmmmm ....

 

 

 

 

Tiny Tazmanian Devil - 1, Mama - 0.  Something's gotta give.  I cannot continue in this state of disorder!  My proposed solution ... CREATE A CLEANING SCHEDULE.  While cleaning used to happen naturally, as I saw need, now I must set aside time for it and have a plan of attack or I fear the clutter will overtake me.  There are several wonderful sites with free printable cleaning schedules, but I feel like daily and weekly cleaning tasks are somewhat personal.  Everyone (and every home) will have different daily and weekly needs.

 

But if you need a sample, here is the cleaning schedule I've created for myself. 

If you have the time (and the right computer program), you can get creative and make your cleaning schedule look like Subway Art.  You can even dress it in a picture frame and cross off the tasks with a dry erase marker.  I am happy with a simple list posted on my kitchen bulletin board.

Personally, I would much rather see this adorable (even if outdated) picture of my niece smiling back at me through my kitchen picture frame. 

 

I've been sticking with the Daily Schedule for a few days, and I only am upset that I didn't start this sooner.  My morning & evening tasks take about 20 - 30 minutes each, and make a world of difference in keeping things clean and tidy.  Plus, the weekly and monthly tasks have restored peace to my home.  If I see a fingerprinted window or a troubling toilet rim,  it no longer stresses me out.  I can clean it immediatley if I have the time.  Or, if I don't, since I have time set aside for those chores, I know it only will be a day or two before they get done.  I no longer worry about when I will have an entire day to set aside for cleaning.

 

Now, if I could just find a way to bottle the energy of a 7 month old! 

 

 

 



Become a Scripture Junkie

or Habit #3: Spend Time in Scripture Daily

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." -Proverbs 31:30 ... "She speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue."  Proverbs 31:26

According to Eugene Merrill, the definition of "fear" in the Old Testament's Hebrew ranges from "mild easiness" to "stark terror" and a special nuance created within the bible seems to convey "reverential awe" or "worshipful respect".  Baker's Evangelical Dictionary.  While I believe Christians should "fear God" in all of its definitions, today I approach the woman who "fears the Lord" from the "reverential awe" or "worshipful respect" definition.

"Fear of God also lies at the heart of successful living in the world.  Wisdom literature makes it clear that fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, a fear equated with "Knowledge of the Holy One" (Prov. 9:10, Psalm 111:10).  To fear God is to know Him and to know Him is to fear Him."  Baker's Evangelical Dictionary  So, how do we know God?  I cannot think of a better place to begin, than by immersing ourselves in His word.

 

 

"Like newborn babies, long for the pure milk of the word, so that by it you may grow in respect to salvation" --1 Peter 2:2

Today, this verse hits me like a dart between the eyes - maybe because with a seven month old, my body remains exhausted from my newborn's longing for milk.  Even after so many months, I often feel that I am a slave to the milk supply - it determines what I eat (not too spicy, limited caffeine, avoid aspartame ...), how much I eat (enough to produce milk), when I work and when I play (sometime between feedings/pumpings) and when I rest (bedtime must be after the last feed/pump, and wake time must be close to the first feeding). 

Whew!  All of this because my baby longs, yearns, aches and even demands milk throughout the day, several times a day without ceasing.  She behaves like a "milk junkie", screaming and shaking when her supply is low.  She cannot survive without it.  My newborn's milk nourishes her with every vitamin, protein, even the fluids she needs daily. 

Milk brings her nourishment, yes, but it brings with it much more than that.  In times of hardship (sickness or other discomfort) or in times of growth, she yearns for it more often and demands an even greater supply.  A newborn's milk gives her comfort in times of trouble, warmth in times of cold, protection from diseases/infections, and when feeding from the mother, it even satisfies her desire for human contact and bonding.*

Peter uses this longing that a newborn has for mother's milk to describe the longing that we as believers should have for God's word.  We should yearn to be in His word constantly, for we cannot survive against the world without it.  His word should sustain us daily.  It should be the first source of comfort in times of hardship.  For His word connects us to Him, partly satisfying our desire to bond with Him.  Psalm 119:105 says, "Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path."   Knowing the scriptures gives us direction, and protects us from distractions trying to pull us off course.

As C.S. Lewis writes in Mere Christianity:  "If you want to get warm you must stand near the fire: if you want to be wet you must get into the water. If you want joy, power, peace, eternal life, you must get close to, or even into, the thing that has them."  The only way to get close to God, to have an intimate relationship with Him, is by living in His word.

This is a recommitment, and one I'm sure I'll make again and again as often in life, we allow time-pressures and other distractions to pull us away from this foundational activity.  I, for one, let other priorities take precedence over spending time with God in a faulty attempt at life balance.  When I know that my life only truly will be balanced when my time with God is first priority.  As C.S. Lewis also writes in The Screwtape Letters (his imagined account of conversations between two demons tasked with securing the demise of their human "patients"),

"Screwtape offers ways to cleverly exploit the Patient's dry spell:
...there is an even better way of exploiting the trough; I mean through the patient's own thoughts about it.  As always, the first step is to keep knowledge out of his mind ... keep him out of the way of experienced Christians ... Talk to him about 'moderation in all things'.  If you can once get him to the point of thinking that 'religion is all very well up to a point', you can feel quite happy about his soul.  A moderated religion is as good for us as no religion at all - and more amusing."

Over these next few weeks, I commit to making a habit of immersing myself in His word first thing each morning.  I will not let distractions, or skewed priorities or other forces keep this knowledge of God "out of my mind". 

If you are looking for a guide to immersing yourself in scripture, this is a wonderful place to start.  One Year Bible.  It gives a little bit of the Old Testament, a little of the New, a Psalm and Proverb for each day.  (If it's a little too overwhelming, start with just the Psalm and the Proverb.)




*My source for the benefits of breastfeeding is my pediatrician's recommended website, Benefits of Breastfeeding Accd to HealthyChildren.org

The Price of Excellence (or Organizing My Life)

"She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness." 
Proverbs 31:27

In Proverbs 31 (and throughout scripture), we are called to use our time wisely to advance His kingdom, avoiding time wasted in "idleness".  Also, 1 Corinthians commands us to glorify God in everything we do.  ("So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." 1 Corinthians 10:31)  I believe, in part, this means doing everything to the best of our ability. 

As I examine my daily activites over the past few months, I see a good bit of time wasted in "idleness", not out of laziness or apathy but out of failure to plan or prepare.  During the disruption of days that necessarily follows the introduction of a newborn to the home, my world has fallen into disorganization.  Many of the things I do are not being done well (certainly not excellently), and not because God has failed to equip me for the tasks.  I desire to use my time wisely and to do everything to the best of my ability for the glory of God.  In order to do this, I must approach everything in my life purposefully and with discipline.  As William Arthur Ward said, "The price of excellence is discipline.  The cost of mediocrity is disappointment."  He also laid out four steps to acievement: "Plan purposefully.  Prepare Prayerfully.  Proceed Positively.  Pursue Persistently."  This may be my new life mantra.

In order to "plan purposefully", I must first organize all areas of my life and make it easy to plan my time for each area.  This has inspired my Habit 2:  Create and Keep "Organize My Life" Binders.  You most likely have heard about (or may even have your own) Homekeeping Binder.  I prefer entitling them "Organize My Life" Binders, because it makes me laugh and because I need organization both inside and outside the home. I have created two binders.  My "Homekeeping Binder" holds all that I need at home.  My "Professional Planning Binder" holds all that I need as a "professional" outside the home.
 

I.  THE HOMEKEEPING BINDER

A Homekeeping Binder simply creates a place to organize all of your homekeeping activities, and gets all those scattered papers off of your counters and into a single organized space.  My binder has 4 tabs:  (1) Cleaning, (2) Meal Planning, (3) Couponing and (4) Baby Info.  (My binders are not perfectly beautiful like others you may find online, because I did not purchase a single item for them.  I used recycled materials that I found around the house, but they did the job for me.)

 

I used a brightly colored notebook for my Homekeeping Binder, because the colors make me happy.  It can be playful, because it stays in the home.

I also used pocketed dividers, to give myself somewhere to stash papers that don't need to be hole punched.

(1) CLEANING

In my "Cleaning" section, I have several cleaning lists and schedules.  I inserted most schedules in plastic sheet protectors, so I can use a dry erase marker to check off lists.  This way the lists are reusable.  (Next week, I will start using a daily cleaning schedule.)

Free printable (and oh, so cute) cleaning schedules can be found here:
http://www.cleanmama.net/free-printables





(2) MEAL PLANNING

 

 

In my "Meal Planning" section, I once again have a printed calendar in clear plastic sheet protectors to allow the calendar to be used again and again thanks to the magic of a dry erase marker.  I intend to plan meals 2 weeks in advance, but I have four weekly calendars so that I can go 4 weeks without erasing.

In the back of the Meal Planning section, I've included clear sheet protectors for Delivery and Take-Out Menus.  (Goodbye Junk Drawer!!)

Wonderful calendars and meal planners can be found here.  (These forms may not be as colorful as the ones at cleanmamma.net, but they are incredibly functional.)

www.donnayoung.org

(3) COUPONING

In my "Couponing" section, I've inserted business card protectors to hold my coupons.  I've also included a list to keep track of online deals, such as Groupons.

(4) BABY INFO

Lastly, I don't have pictures of it, but in my "Baby Info" section, I've included my 6 month old's daily schedule (easy access for babysitters) along with our emergency contact sheet and our pediatrician's handouts for this stage. 

Here is a good Emergency Contact Form:

http://www.babycenter.com/emergency-contact-worksheet

II. THE PROFESSIONAL PLANNING BINDER

My Professional Planning Binder has 5 tabs:
(1) Daily Planner, (2) Job Search, (3) Entrepreneur, (4) Civic/Church and (5) Blogging.

Because I may carry this binder with me to professional engagements, it is solid black in color to look more polished and executive.  The cover sheet in this binder is my daily To-Do List.  It is laminated, so I may reuse it with a wet-erase marker.

The above "To-Do" list was found here:

http://www.cleanmama.net/free-printables

Less colorful, but more detailed planners and lists can be found here:

http://donnayoung.org/index.htm

In my "Daily Schedule" tab, I keep an hour-by-hour planner for each day.  In it I record both planned use of time, as well as actual use of time.  This way I can see when time is used productively and when time is wasted.  The other tabs are pretty self-explanatory. 

I'm new to  this idea, so if you already use similar binders, please share what works for you and your family.  Day One and I'm already beginning to feel like a new, more productive, woman.

 



 



Hi God ... Remember Me?

 

"Don't pray when you feel like it. Have an appointment with the Lord and keep it. 

A man is powerful on his knees." Corrie ten Boom

 

 

"My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him." Psalm 62:5

 

"Pray without ceasing."  1 Thess. 5:17

 

 

After periods of prayer drought in my life, I often resist turning back to Him because it feels like that first awkward conversation with a friend you've neglected ... "Do you even remember me?"  I sometimes even feel like I have to get the rest of my spiritual life in order before I speak to God - like I'm embarrassed to present myself to Him as I really am.  (Like he doesn't already know?) 

Then I'm reminded of my favorite author C.S. Lewis's quote*: "We must lay before Him what is in us, not what ought to be in us."  Letters to Malcolm:  Chiefly on Prayer.    As I embark on this 31 Day commitment, I will do just that.  Prayer is the first habit that must precede all others, which is why I am beginning it before the official 31 day count -- a precursor to My Road to Proverbs 31, if you will. 

Habit 1:  Pray Daily.  I commit to waking each morning before my child does and spending time in prayer.  I will pray because it draws me closer to God, because He does hear and sometimes even grant requests, and because I am commanded to pray.

Sometimes I've heard people ask, "If God is Sovereign, why pray?  Will He really change anything because I ask Him?"  This is a question that most Christians ask ourselves at one point or another.  I love C.S. Lewis's answer to this question in God in the Dock:

"Praying for particular things," said I, "always seem to be like advising God how to run the world.  Wouldn't it be wiser to assume He knows best?"  "On the same principle," said he, "I suppose you never ask a man next to you to pass the salt, because God knows best whether you ought to have salt or not.  And supppose you never take an umbrella because God knows best whether you ought to be wet or dry?"  "That's quite different," I protested.  "I don't see why," he said.  "The odd thing is that He should let us influence the course of events at all.  But since He does let us do it in one way, I don't see why He shouldn't let us do it in another."

However, believing in petitionary prayer can lead to a skewed view of prayer - more akin to talking to a genie in a bottle than a sovereign God.  A God that hears our prayers, granting some of what we ask but not all of what we ask can seem paradoxical.  I believe C.S. Lewis gives a wonderful answer to this as well:

"Prayer is not a machine. It is not magic. It is not advice offered to God ...

"Can we believe that God ever really modifies His action in response to the suggestions of men?  ... He could, if he chose, repair our bodies miraculously without food; or give us food without the aid of farmers, bakers, and butchers; or knowledge without the aid of learned men; or convert the heathen without the aid of missionaries. He allows soils and weather and animals and the muscles, minds, and wills of men to co-operate in the execution of His will. “God,” said Pascal, “instituted prayer in order to lend to His creatures the dignity of causality.” But not only prayer; whenever we act at all He lends us that dignity. It is not really stranger, nor less strange, that my prayers should affect the course of events than that my other actions should do so. They have not advised or changed God's mind—that is, His over-all purpose. But that purpose will be realized in different ways according to the actions, including the prayers, of His creatures." Efficacy of Prayer (emphasis added)

We're even given an example of petitionary prayer in Exodus 32, when Moses intercedes asking the Lord not to "bring disaster on [His] people".  After which God relented and put his wrath on hold: "The Lord changed his mind and did not bring on His people the disaster He had threatened" (Exodus 32:14). 

Even so, we know that God grants some requests and not others.  And we know that these requests have nothing to do with the holiness of the person doing the asking.   For we also are given an example of a request of the most holy man denied.  When Christ asks "let this cup pass from me", we know that Christ's request did not fit into God's overall plan.  So, His request was not granted.  (Matthew 26:36-42, Mark 14:35-36, Luke 22:41-42)

In the words of C.S. Lewis, again:

 "Prayer in the sense of petition, asking for things, is a small part of [prayer]; confession and penitence are its threshold, adoration its sanctuary, the presence and vision and enjoyment of God its bread and wine. In it God shows Himself to us ...

 "Petitionary prayer is, nonetheless, both allowed and commanded to us: “Give us our daily bread.”  Efficacy of Prayer (emphasis added)
 

So, starting today, I will pray in adoration and confession.  I will pray for God's presence and vision, and to enjoy being close to Him.  And, yes, I also will pray in petition.

                                                                                                                                                           

 

MY PRAYER TO GOD

 

Lord, You have said in Your Word that if I draw near to You, You will draw near to Me also. (James 4:8)  I ache for a deeper and more intimate relationship with You.  Over the next several weeks, continue drawing me closer to You until I reside in Your presence and walk in the center of the path You've laid out for me. 

 

As I begin this 31 day "spring cleaning" of my soul, "Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."  (Psalm 139:23-24)  Lord, lend me Your wisdom and strength not only in choosing habits but in following through with them.  (1 Chron. 16:11)

 

As Your Scripture states, "the Spirit helps us in our weakness.  We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans." (Romans 8:26)  Lord, I know that I may not always know exactly what to pray for, but I ask for the power of the Holy Spirit praying through me.  I ask for guidance in my efforts to be a good steward of my time, talents and blessings. 

 

And, above all, I ask that You be glorified in ALL that I do -- whether as a mom, as a wife, as a daughter, as a sister, as a friend, as a worker and in every other facet of my life.  I am so thankful for Christ's sacrifice, and over the next 31 days, I ask that You draw me to a life more evident of the "new person" I have become through You.  (Galations 2:20)

 

In Christ's Name -- Amen

                                                                                                                                                                  

 



I know my first post has been quite wordy, but I appreciate you letting me have my catharsis with you. 





 

* After scripture, C.S. Lewis usually is my first resource when interpreting the scriptures. I find his writing lovely, and I have yet to read an interpretation of his with which I don't agree. 

"Efficacy of Prayer" by C.S. Lewis in its entirety may be read here:

http://www.scribd.com/doc/29832112/Efficacy-of-Prayer-C-S-Lewis